Tokyo 2040: Breaking Down the Walls
by Shikami Yamino
Summary: Throughout the series, Priss's thoughts are somewhat of a mystery, as are her actions.


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**Bubblegum Crisis Tokyo 2040:  
"Breaking Down the Walls"  
** by Shikami Yamino

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**Disclaimer:** All characters and specifics of "Bubblegum Crisis Tokyo 2040" are copyrighted AIC and associates. English version copyrighted ADV Films. All rights reserved. This fanfiction is property of Shikami Yamino and is not intended for any monetary purpose nor an infringement of copyright laws. No one is to post/host/use any aspect of this fanfic without explicit permission from the author.

**Note:** ^_^ Well this is my first attempt at a 2040 fic so please be kind! This is based completely on the ADV dubs since I have yet to see the raw Jap version. But as ADV dubs tend to be pretty accurate in terms of translating, I hope it won't have deviated too much from the original storyline. Got this idea while waiting a week between each show and watching the relationship between Priss and Leon grow ^^;;; If anyone wonders, Priss is my favorite character and I do prefer her with Leon although I do admit I often see hints of Priss/Linna ^_^ I've tried to stick to the actual plotline although not everything that happens in this fic will have taken place in the series, but most of the dialogue is actually quoted ^^;; Well, as close as I could hear anyway. Told from Priss's POV, here is my take on the development of the Priss/Leon relationship and Priss's emergence from her shell! Hope you enjoy!

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The first time I saw him, it was in the midst of a trashed restaurant with a rogue boomer running around sticking its huge-ass tongue everywhere. 

Needless to say, it wasn't a very good first impression. 

I was still very much inside my shell at that time... and he was every bit the AD Police officer I'd come to hate; cocky, arrogant and altogether too annoying. I mean, he actually tried to hit on me while there was a rogue boomer right in front of him! 

At the time, it reminded me of things I really didn't want to remember... 

But that mission was over and done for, and I would have forgotten him along with all the other AD Police idiots I'd had the unfortunate pleasure of meeting... If he hadn't come looking for me... 

A few nights after the mission, he'd shown up at Hot Legs, waiting outside beside my bike after the show. 

*Thanks for saving my life the other day. At least that's what I was hoping you'd say.* 

What a joke that was. He saved me? I'd been doing fine all by myself before he'd shown up. Not to mention that it probably would have been more correct to say that we'd saved him by killing the boomer like we did. But I wasn't in a laughing mood. His assuming that I'd be forever grateful to him for 'saving my life' simply increased my contempt of the AD Police. 

Then the call came in and I'd taken off, tossing a stinging parting comment behind me as farewell. 

I didn't expect to see him again. I didn't want to see him again. It was why I'd erected this image for myself, why I'd put up the walls around me. He reminded me too much of... him... And I didn't want to ever again feel the way I did when I lost him... 

But it appeared that someone upstairs had a thing against me. 

A few weeks later, I passed him and his partner in their AD Police car on the highway. That had been the beginning of an interesting drag race... I'd forgotten what it'd felt like to have the wind in my hair, my full concentration on the mechanical beast under me, the road in front, and the worthy competitor behind me, dogging my every move. 

I hadn't drag raced anyone since... him... And when the memory surfaced under the adrenaline, I'd immediately pulled over. I remember thinking how could I? Especially with an AD Police officer??! And by the time he pulled up mere seconds later, I was back to being my bitchy, enclosed self, and bitter as Hell. 

So when he asked me why I hated the AD Police, I let him have it. 

*Do you think putting on that badge, makes you special and apart from the rest of us?? And the most pathetic part is that you don't even realize what you are. You're just a tool. A maggot feeding on a dead corpse.* 

I hadn't wanted to admit it then... But in those few minutes of drag racing, I'd had more fun than I'd had in the last few years. 

The show that night had been awesome, nice and tight from opening to encore. Walking off the stage made me feel a lot better than I had in a long time... and looking back, I can finally admit why. 

I used to sing for him... It was our dream, to tour and sing together. But then he left... And I joined Sekiria... That was why I'd told the reporter who interviewed me that singing to me, meant I was alive, and not dead and buried... like him... 

Yet somewhere along the line, my focus had changed. And that night, I wasn't singing for him anymore. The face that had flashed in front of my eyes hadn't been his... it had been Leon's. 

I'd been too chicken to realize it then, but unconsciously, I'd known. Returning to Hot Legs that same night after the mission, I'd unknowingly hoped to recapture some of the feeling I'd left behind. Launching into an impromptu solo performance, I'd been surprised to see Linna, Nene and Macky there... But out of the corner of my eye, I'd recognized his silhouette leaning against the side exit. I had felt my lips turning upwards, but I'd pretended not to notice him and continued with my private concert... 

I paid for that letting down of guard a few days later when Nene called. 

*I just realized that you're not as tough as you pretend to be.* 

What was I thinking?? Getting involved? Letting people in?? With an AD Police officer no less!! I'd reinforced the walls then... But it hadn't been my walls that needed reinforcing... it was my resolve to keep them there. But somehow, the resolve that I'd had before just wasn't there anymore... 

We saw each other occasionally over the next few months, but outwardly, nothing changed. He was still his cocky self and I was still the bitch desperately hiding behind her walls. But I'll never forget the instance when I was sure he was going to die... 

Nene, Linna and I had gone after the pair of idiots that were he and his partner who thought they were so invincible that they could take on a monster that ate boomers for bite-sized snacks. Finding them in a room littered with human entrails and the remains of the Genom assault squad wasn't exactly a comforting sight. Finding him the target of the monster's next attack froze me altogether. 

I really should have let Linna do it. She was in front of me and had a better chance of success. Not to mention that she was the angel among us, wanting to help people. I was simply in it for the money. But without a second thought, I'd pushed in front and dived for him, catching him around the waist and firing my thrusters to get us both out of harm's way. From his comments after I'd set him down, he wasn't exactly appreciative. 

*How do they keep doing it?? Do I have a tracking beacon on my butt or what??* 

But then I wasn't exactly paying attention, too busy taking out the monster and then justifying to myself that I'd simply done it to save a life. My ever helpful mind had then supplied me with images of the few AD Police who'd been shish-kebabed right in front of me by that overgrown industrial monster a coupla missions back. I'd logically reasoned that if I'd saved them then, I would have cost us some serious tactical advantages, and neutralizing the boomer was my primary objective. 

But underneath it all... I knew that wasn't the real reason I'd saved him... 

It was on that same mission that I realized the cracks in my walls began to become visible. That bet with Sylia about Nene's performance... I wasn't exactly angry that I'd lost, instead, while I was in the monster's clutches, I was perversely kinda proud of Nene, knowing that she would come through when we needed her. 

And then there was the incident with Linna. 

*You need to give up that dead end job.* 

It had been said without even a second thought. 

*Wow. That almost sounded like you cared about me.* 

It did... and instantly I'd tried to revert to my careless self, grabbing my jacket and trying to leave... But it wasn't working as well anymore. I couldn't see why I'd done it then, but now, I know that I saw the indecision in Linna's eyes and unconsciously decided to help her in my own incompetent way by convenienty 'forgetting' to tell Sylia that she was out of town and thereby forcing her to make her decision and put her priorities in order. 

So there I was, starting to get a grip on my place as a member of this.. team... on my feelings, good feelings, about being a member... And then the world went to Hell. 

Nene dug up records, confronted Sylia about withholding information and ultimately ran out. Meanwhile, I was desperately trying to cling to the remaining pieces of what I'd just come to appreciate, conveniently using a sense of duty as a front. 

*But that doesn't change the fact that there's something out there we need to find, so let's just get with the program and find it okay?* 

Then Galatea happened... 

Getting out of the tunnel system in the dark was a bitch when all you were wearing was a skin suit. The feeling of being naked was compounded by the brutal fact that we were defenceless should any boomer decide to come along. So when the light appeared, we'd been rightfully cautious, and I, being the only one not holding Sylia up, decided to check it out. 

I wasn't sure what I could do with only a metal pipe as a weapon if it really was a boomer, but it helped take away the feeling of helplessness. But when I heard his voice, I couldn't keep the surprise out of mine when I said his name. I think that was the first time I ever said his name out loud. And I said it again, in surprise, when he left, leaving us the flashlight. In the few words we'd exchanged, I'd been forced to admit that he was really nothing like the image of the AD Police I had in my head. He actually cared about the people he was supposed to serve and protect... 

Looking back, I wasn't sure exactly when the walls separating myself from others began to not only crack, but collapse. I suppose it started when Linna joined the Knight Sabers. She brought to the team the spark that had been missing, and somehow, though I didn't know what it was, I recognized it in her from the first time we met. It was why I'd surprised even Sylia by pitching her as the fourth Knight Saber, though at the time I'd told myself that it was because I couldn't fight with Nene anyway. Linna was perhaps the very first person I could call a friend, and with her there, I'd found that it was much harder not to form bonds with each and everyone of them... and Leon... 

Despite my rough exterior and careless attitude, they'd managed to worm their way in. And that's why it'd hurt so much to know that Sylia had betrayed me. When Galatea had shown up, everything about my hardsuit and Sylia's elusive behaviour had clicked in my head. And when Linna had arrived at Hot Legs, demanding to know if I would go see Sylia, I'd let my anger trickle to the surface. 

*And why are you bothering to worry about them anyway Linna? It's not like Sylia was your friend, or Nene your sister. We just work together, that was all that connected us!* 

I was so desperate to believe that working together was all that connected us, but it wasn't and by then the walls were almost gone so that I knew I was lying. 

*Priss! I'm not giving up yet! Maybe you can just quit! But I can't! I'm sorry Priss, but somethings are just too important!!* 

To the freshly betrayed me of then, Linna's words had seemed like another kind of betrayal and I could feel my world start to fall apart around me. So I reached for the only thing that I had to keep myself on my feet. 

*Can you ride a bike?* 

He had done me one better, having come to Hot Legs on his own two wheels. Racing him down the empty highway toward the beach, he'd seemed to sense my inner turmoil, steering the conversation to lighter topics. Grateful for the momentary diversion, I'd repaid the favour by telling him the real reason behind my hatred of the AD Police. 

*You're painting with a wide brush. We don't all feel that way, just a few big jerks.* 

I was just beginning to figure that out. 

But once we'd stopped and stared out across the water at the Genom tower, and I was once again lost in my thoughts of the Knight Sabers, Genom, Galatea and the Soti, he'd tentatively broached the topic. 

*Your team's breaking up isn't it? Uh, sorry... maybe that was too personal. But I'd really hate to see that happen. Competing with you was all that kept some of us going.* 

After a few more exchanges, I'd been getting ready to go, but the glaring spotlight from an AD Police firebee blinded me instead. Then I'd seen him pulling out his badge. 

*Stow it, jerk! Can't you see I'm trying to score here? See this badge? It matches the plates on my unmarked vehicle! Now beat it!!* 

I could feel my face flush right then. 'Score'? Choosing to ignore the comment, I'd concentrated on his other action. 

*So, you turning over a new leaf, huh?* 

*Yeah well, I'm trying. Sorry. Argh... guess I could have phrased that a little nicer huh? I'm just not used to dealing with people who aren't cops.* 

From the nervous look on his face I got the impression that he wasn't used to apologizing for his actions. And I was just about to comment again when Sylia's memories checked me. All the while, I could hear him worriedly calling my name... 

Over the next few days, I kept to myself and the band, immersing myself in my music. I didn't want to see any of the girls. And he had his own problems to deal with. It's true what they say, ignorance is bliss. As long as I only suspected and had no concrete evidence, I could have still pretended. But that night at Sylia's, after hearing Sylia admit everything that I'd suspected, I'd lashed out. 

*How can you sit there and pretend that any of us mean anything to you? I used to think your money was worth putting up with your games, but you knew how I felt about boomers and you still lied to me, you bitch! Spare me your goddamned explanations! I'm outta here. Bye Linna.* 

And then I'd walked out on the team... And though it had felt right then, I couldn't have denied that I was feeling more lonely than ever. So there I was, practising and trying to blank my mind with the music, but even Jaid could tell something was wrong. 

*You wanna take a break?* 

*No, I'm cool.* 

They took it at face value, as they took all my comments at face value. I guess they'd learned not to pry into my life because I simply wouldn't answer a question if I didn't like it. But if they could have picked up on my wandering concentration, my walls must have been really flimsy around then. 

Walking outside the studio for a break, I'd heard my phone going off and then Linna's worried voice. 

*It's about time you answered the phone! Priss, Nene's in big trouble.* 

As Linna briefly relayed the situation, my heart had started pounding, and without even a flimsy excuse to the others, I'd taken off, breaking every speed limit to get to the Silky Doll. 

*Then are you sitting here?! Why aren't you trying to rescue her?!" 

*How?! We don't have our hardsuits, remember?* 

*Screw your goddamned hardsuits! No way in Hell!* 

*Oh yeah! It's not like we're your friends or sisters, is it?* 

I think at that time, both Linna and I were so worried that we didn't know what we were fighting about. It was just a convenient way to get out all the frustration about being helpless. But when she threw my words, my lies, back at me, I realized that there was no point in hiding behind my walls with these women. As weird as it might sound, I knew then that standing there was the only family I had... Not to mention my outburst had just totally revealed my worry for Nene... So I had focused on a way to get Nene out... 

As Macky had left with Nigel to rig up the Motoslave, I'd spoken before Linna had had the chance to crack a smart remark at me about how much I cared. 

*All right... maybe a step-sister...* 

I was still stubborn. 

Seeing him at the ADP Tower was a surprise that shouldn't have been a surprise. Guess I was still edgy about letting go of my stereotypical view about the AD Police. I hadn't liked asking for help, but considering I knew zilch about the layout of the ADP Tower, I really had no choice. I needed to get to Nene. Fast. 

*Do you really want to try and find Nene all by yourself?* 

*Get on.* 

But now I wonder if getting to Nene was my only reason. Afterall, he was going in with or without me, and I guess I figured there was strength in numbers... And his arms around my waist wasn't exactly an unwelcome warmth either... 

Getting to Nene and having her arms wrapped around me while she cried and mumbled about how she knew I'd come for her made me feel a lot better about letting down the walls between me and the three women in my life. We were each strong enough on our own, but together, we made a better team and family than I could imagine. Even Nene, though she may look and sound like a baby, she hadn't cried during her entire time stuck in the building. The tears had only come when she saw me, and they'd stopped soon after that. 

Getting out wasn't exactly a fun experience, but we managed. And over the next few days as the city of Tokyo evacuated itself with a giant boomer-infested ADP Tower standing watch, I made my peace with Sylia, got a look at the new hardsuits and I knew that deep down, I was itching for action again. 

*Don't look so prissy, you know that you want one!* 

Linna had been right, but at the time I'd still had my reservations, so I'd cracked a joke about the transparent abdominal shell that I'd been pretty sure Linna hadn't seen yet. I was getting better at that... making the most of the absence of the walls that had separated me from what I had wanted for so long... Linna's subsequent tirade at Macky had, not unwillingly, brought a chuckle to my lips. 

However, Nene's frantic call about the boomer on the express way shattered what reservations I had left. The Knight Sabers were needed... and I was already itching... 

*Then prep her for launch dammit! And make one for me!* 

* * *

Shaking myself from my thoughts, I winced as I pulled on an oversized white t-shirt. Those teeth had really hurt. Guess I really owed him my life this time... 

He was waiting for me when I stepped out from my trailer. 

"Sure you don't need to go see a doctor?" 

"I'm fine." 

"It's nice to see that you own something that's not made of leather. So just what is it with the urban combat look anyway?" 

I frowned. Did he like throwing me off on purpose? Sometimes I think he's okay, but sometimes I know he's the jerk I'd made him out to be when we first met. Why couldn't he make up his mind? 

At my frown, his face fell and he put a hand up to his head in a nervous gesture. "And Leon the dork puts his foot in his mouth again." 

I smiled slightly. At least he was getting better at the apologizing without sounding like he was apologizing thing. 

Looking up into the city skyline and noting all the dark windows, I sighed. "Isn't there anybody left in town?" 

"No. The whole place has shut down." 

I swore softly under my breath. 

He smiled a little and started fiddling with his palm pilot. "Well, giant man-eating robots tend to scare most people. And besides..." He held out the vid screen in his palm and beckoned me closer. 

I looked in curiously. "What kind of soldiers are those?" 

"UN RDF troops. They're trying to cut Tokyo off from the rest of Japan. To keep the voomer plague from spreading." 

My eyes intent on the screen in his hand, I gasped and jerked away when I felt a hand clamp around my arm. I tugged slightly but he wouldn't let go... just looked at me with those liquid brown eyes of his... 

After a few seconds, I decided I had to break the silence. "Leon... what are you thinking about?" 

He cut me off with a finger on my lips. And then I could see his face coming closer... 

I could have gotten away, and a part of me was screaming at me to do just that. Sure, he had a hand on my arm, but my other arm was perfectly fine for slapping away unwanted advances. But the other part of me wasn't so sure that this was an unwanted advance. I was so tired of being alone... Now that most of my walls had been stripped from me, I finally understood what loneliness was... 

And Nigel... Nigel was with Sylia... 

But if I really thought about it, I hadn't really wanted Nigel... He was just someone I had a connection with, a love of motorbikes... He was just someone I could pretend I wanted, and when the loneliness got too bad, could pretend that he'd be there for me... And he was there for me, but only as a friend... 

I'd heard his conversation with Sylia through the door. His attitude towards her was nothing like his attitude towards me. And having heard it... I could finally open my eyes... 

Besides... him... the only person that had been there for me the way I wanted was... the man standing in front of me now... 

But... I still had my doubts... I wasn't ready to give up all of my walls yet... Yet... 

*beepbeep beepbeep* 

Pulling apart suddenly, my insides were warring again as to whether the intrusion was welcome. Meanwhile, I reached for my phone while I tried to keep my face from flushing. 

"There you are! We need you at the pit!" 

Linna's tone of voice was clearly expecting to be followed, but as I stammered for a reply unsure as to what I should be doing, Linna picked up on my reluctance. 

"What? Is somebody there..?" 

I panicked. "No! Nobody! I just don't feel like coming in right now!" 

Linna blinked on screen. "You what...?" And was then unceremoniously shoved aside by an excited Nene. 

"We don't have time to argue about this! Get your ass down here, this thing's huge! Godzilla sized!!" 

The phone clicked off, and after that last comment, there really wasn't any choice. And the small part of me still cowering behind what was left of the walls breathed a small sigh of relief at the opportunity to put off whatever had been going on before we were interrupted. 

Looking back at him, knowing he'd heard what'd been said, I noticed for the first time the faint blush that dusted his cheeks as well. Blinking in surprise, I barely heard his next words. 

"Look Priss... Why don't I drive..? Those cuts look bad no matter what you say and with me driving at least you won't get the full blast of the wind." 

Looking back at my beloved bike, I pondered the suggestion. It wasn't a question of his abilities, it was simply a question of whether I felt comfortable with someone other than me at the handlebars. I guess I'm attached to my bike that way, it represented the control and subsequent freedom I have on my life. Was I ready to give control of it over to someone else..? Even just for a few minutes? 

My wounds made the decision for me, sending pain signals up to my brain in rapid succession. I really couldn't handle the wind in this condition and my jacket would be too abrasive to help. 

Wordlessly I held out my keys to him. 

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**End Part 1... To be continued...**

**Author's Notes:** This is actually a very rough draft ^_^ which I hope to polish up when I get more time. What continues after this will actually parallel the rest of the series, giving more insight into Priss's thoughts and therefore actions. But as this is my first 2040 fic, I'd really love some feedback coz I don't know whether it's worth continuing this, or to just scrap it all together. Looking forward to you comments~!


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